Holding Onto Knots at the End of Your Rope
by The Peep93
Summary: Dean's no stranger to being overwhelmed by the situations he finds himself in.  And if there's one thing he's learned, it's that when you reach the end of your rope, sometimes all you can do is tie a knot in it and hold on.


Dean groaned inwardly as he saw the black sludge, or blood, or WHATEVER the crap was that proved it wasn't just some animal that attacked these kids in the shower room. A Leviathan had been there, and from the way this thing destroyed seven teenagers, they were in for a fight. Dean shook his head and made his way back to the Impala. All the thoughts he'd been trying to keep at bay for the past few weeks all seemed to flood to the surface at once.

How were they supposed to kill something that was older than even the archangels? Something that God himself created Purgatory for. They didn't even know how many of them there were, or where they were hiding. How were they supposed to draw them out?

**Can you draw out Leviathan with a fishhook, or press down his tongue with a cord? Can you put a rope in his nose, or pierce his jaw with a hook? **

The one time they'd been face to face with one, in Cass's body, the thing driving was CRAZY. It was powerful, and it knew it. And there was so much power… They tore up the meat suit faster than Lucifer had ever done to the poor guy he had possessed. They were lucky he WAS so strong, otherwise it would have done them in, and Dean was certain it wouldn't have been very pleasant at all.

**Will he make many please to you? Will he speak to you with soft words? Will he make a covenant with you to take him for your servant forever?**

What did you even call these things? Were they demons? Fallen angels? Were they human once? Before Cass lost control, he talked about them in the plural. How many of them ARE there? If God was absent, and they were free from purgatory, who controlled them? Who was their leader?

**Will you play with him as with a bird, or will you put him on a leash for your daughters? Will traders bargain over him? Will they divide him up among the merchants? **

Later, when Dean had gotten a call from Bobby about finding some of them in a local hospital, he threw his head back against the seat in his car and it was all he could do to hold back tears. Bobby said he shot it full of silver buckshot and it didn't even phase it. How were they supposed to kill these things? And there were so many… They were too old. There was no lore to reference here. There were no ancient accounts of humans having to kill a Leviathan. The only thing they could dig up about the Leviathan at all was an account in the Bible, and all that did was say that humans didn't stand a chance against it.

**Can you fill his skin with harpoons, or his head with fishing spears? Lay your hands on him; remember the battle – you will not do it again! Behold, the hope of a man is false; he is laid low even at the sight of him. No one is so fierce that he dares to stir him up.**

**His heart is hard as a stone, hard as the lower millstone. When he raises himself up, the mighty are afraid; at the crashing they are beside themselves. **

**Though the sword reaches him, it does not avail, nor the spear, the dart, or the javelin. He counts iron as straw, and bronze as rotten wood. The arrow cannot make him flee; for him sling stones are turned to stubble. **

**On earth there is not his like, a creature without fear. He sees everything that is high; he is king over all the sons of pride.**

And when Dean found Sam in a warehouse, firing his gun at nothing, he didn't know what to do. When he turned the gun on Dean, when he thought he was LUCIFER… That lump in Dean's throat that had been threatening to explode gave a quiver of excitement. Dean swallowed it down once again, because damn it, Sammy needed him.

Just like the whole world needed him, and he'd done everything he could to save it, but one thing after another kept coming and-

Now wasn't the time for that. Sammy first.

So he told Sam about his time in Hell, and he grabbed the cut on his hand to show him that THIS was real. HE was real, and Sam was out of the pit and back in the real world and no matter what kind of tricks his mind was playing on him, he was SAFE.

But they were still running on borrowed time, so Dean bundled Sam into the Impala and they rode to Bobby's…

And that's where Dean was now. Standing outside the husk that used to be Bobby's house. It was like a bomb had gone off and taken the scraps of Dean's life with it. If something happened to Bobby…

He called Bobby's cell and told him EXACTLY what he would do if Bobby was gone. He kill the both of them, because there's no way he would be able to hold back the end of the world, AGAIN, be there for Sammy while he was dealing with his memories of hell, and do it all alone. He would go against all his morals and every fiber of his being, and he'd take the easy way out.

He'd run away.

Who could blame him, though? How could he possibly be expected to save the world for what, the 3rd time? How could anybody expect him, on his own, to take out something that only GOD had ever been able to put away.

That thought struck an ugly chord in Dean. The lump in his throat that had become a constant reminder of how OVERWHELMED he was attacked him with full force.

"Why?" he asked silently. His fists clenched as he looked down. "WHY?" he screamed, turning his face up to the misty sky as the tears fell freely. "Where are you?" he demanded. "First you leave us to deal with YOUR archangel problem, then you let all that CRAP happen to Sam! Now, when we're up against something that ONLY you can beat, you can't even give us a LITTLE help?" He paused for a moment. "I can't do this," he said quietly. "I can't take anymore."

The whole world was silent, and then the only sound he heard was Sam's call for help.

With an angry roar, he ran off to face death again.

**Who then is he who can stand before Me? Who has first given to Me, that I should repay him? Whatever is under the whole heaven is Mine.**

_**All things have been handed over to me by my Father, and no one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son, and anyone to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest, Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.**_

_Had to get this little snippet out, because Dean has GOT to be feeling all this crazy stuff right now. And, as much as I hate to admit it, I think this is going to be the last season of our wonderful show. There's got to be a Chuck/God comeback in this one, too, because how else are they going to beat it?_

_Anyway, just something I was thinking about at midnight. The bold verses come from Job 41 (They're mostly in order, but I took some stuff out. They're not out of context, I promise!) The bold/italic stuff comes from Matthew 11: 27-30. I hope you enjoyed! _


End file.
